It's been three odd months since my last entry. I actually intended to release an update in March but then rejected the draft because the way it made things sound wasn't to my liking. And then came a time in which I didn't really know how to properly express what is occupying my mind at all, guess I'm still struggling to find the right words.
I've been to Berlin in the meantime. While I did find the city itself very appealing, the circumstances surrounding my stay weren't the most pleasant ones. Most noteworthy would be the bad weather and the fact that I'm not at all satisfied with the miniscule output this trip produced. Looking back, there were a few glimpses of sincere wonder and amazement and a lot of time wasted due to shoddy planning and ill-fated timing. After my return to Vienna, my dissapointment merged with my predisposed discomfort (there have been some mental setbacks lately) and together they manifested themselves in an odd mix between lethargy, apathy and fatigue. Despite the weather being as fine as it gets I didn't feel the urge to go out and take pictures. This only lasted for two weeks but it felt like an eternity and I guess at the time I wouldn't even have enjoyed pressing the shutter.
I'm glad to be able to say that this time is over now. I feel like I have been emitting some bad vibes lately and I may or may have not created the feeling that I'm a bit absent-minded. Needless to say, I apologize to everyone who might have experienced me that way lately. It's solely a result of me fighting my own demons, my inner desolation. But I think it's fair to say now that I'm back on track again. I consider myself lucky to have great people around me that never cease to provide me with the right attitude that encourages me to keep on doing my thing. These people mean the world to me. There will be some new output soon and I hope that I will also be able to release previously unseen material from an awesome cooperative session I had just days before my trip to Berlin.
As for my mental state right now: For the first time in three months I feel comfortable putting out a new journal entry and I feel some of my vigor returning. Things are looking up I suppose.